not popular...

[ReelyBriansGirl88]

so this isn't much about school as it is just long dance days with milllions of teens and then just in general but people don't really want to talk to me. i feel left out in a lot of things and am always having people talking behind my back. I get along with some things with people but if i wanted people who have the same interests as me i'd be in new york on broadway. i don't have a typical life and it makes people think i'm lying which hurts because i wouldn't ever to anyone. I don't know how to deal with this anymore... help?

[MurrayIrishDancerForLife]

I'm in the same situation and have been since I started school! The trick is to focus on the people who mean something to you. That'd probably be your dance friends, wouldn't it? Focus on making friends there, at dancing, where you have a common interest already. Just don't think about the people at school, kind of let them fade away from your daily thought processes. It takes practise but it works - I've done it and the people at school barely register with me at all. Hope that made some kind of sense...

[awdance99]

And, at my school, most of the popular people turn out to be jerks that cuss, and really make everything dramatic. They aren't nice people. They back-talk the teachers, and are ALWAYS getting in trouble. Trust me, most of the time its the quiet people who are nice. Actually, at the beginning of my 6th grade year, we did this thing where we brought a shoebox filled with stuff about us, and we had to explain it. One girl, who was kinda quiet, and seemed shy, really caught my attention. She seemed nice and interesting. When we went to our classes later that day, I noticed her with my 5th grade friends. Lucky for me, she was in all of my classes. Eventually, we became best friends, and still are today.

[Sweetpea]

Wow, you guys are so mature and give great advice. As a teacher and a mum I want to add that, just because you are not in the "popular" group, does not mean you have to be lonely. Very often those so-called popular kids just give that appearance because they are loud and have an opinion about everything. They are usually also very extroverted, which is sometimes a mask for their insecurity. Sadly they sometimes feel the need to swear and do irresponsible things to be noticed. The quieter kids who are not always trying to get attention often make fantastic friends - dependable and loyal. Anyone who puts others down to make themselves look better is not worth being your friend. Tolerate them and leave them be, they have lots to learn. Find someone like you and be a great friend to them. Together you will rise above the nasties by quietly knowing you are much more mature than they are. And by the way - teachers often adore the children who are different, the true individuals.

[awdance99]

Sweetpea, you have great word choice! Great advice!!!

[Len01182001]

Sorry about your situation! I had to go through the same thing last year, but at school. Why don't you try to look around your dance class, and find people that like the same things you like. I bet you haven't asked anyone if they would like to be on broadway, did you? And if everyone says no, then why don't you try taking intrest in what they like? Say if someone likes painting, you could go home and get some paper and paints and try it out, see if you like it. Just remember...don't be someone you're not to impress other people. As for the popularity thing...those popular kids are just insecure, and cuss, and back-talk make them feel better about themselves! You don't have to be quite to be nice. Nice people can be outgoing, as well! Like this one girl I know, when I came to my new dance school she was so loud and outgoing but she was so nice and we became friends! I hoped I helped.

[irish heatherxox]

Im in the same situation. At school I do not have many friends. My best friend dances with me but goes to a differnt school. I have found that people at school are not always the best of friends but im surviving. I dont really need that many friends at school anyways and my true friends are at dance and dance is the place that Im myself and where I can smile. Just remember at the end of the day to be kind to everyone, but you dont have to be their friend and you dont need to be friends with the popular people. They really dont matter.

[CeiliCrazi]

Originally Posted by irish heatherxox

Im in the same situation. At school I do not have many friends. My best friend dances with me but goes to a differnt school. I have found that people at school are not always the best of friends but im surviving. I dont really need that many friends at school anyways and my true friends are at dance and dance is the place that Im myself and where I can smile. Just remember at the end of the day to be kind to everyone, but you dont have to be their friend and you dont need to be friends with the popular people. They really dont matter.

Same here! It doesn't matter if you are popular or not. I used to think that popularity was all that mattered, but that's totally untrue!

[daffodil80]

It's alright. I am not popular either. But I've noticed that popular girls can be kind of snobby... or mean. And they normally have something to brag about. No, don't brag. Tell somebody something awesome you did, and it could spread. Show them how to Irish Dance! The best thing you can do though, is talk to your parents. They will make you feel better. The age you're going through is hard. It'll be fine in the end.
Good luck! Hope this helps!