What I've Lost and What I've Gained (Fiction)

[ClareJulissa]

A new TCRG thinks back to the days before she passed the exam...


Don't look back when you reach the new shore, sang Lisa Kelly all those years ago.

Don't forget what you're leaving me for.

Don't forget when you're missing me so.

I'll miss my teacher and classmates. I'll miss the thrill of competition. And I'll miss performing.

But there's no future in the past, and what lies before me can be even better then what lies behind.

I'm leaving the States tomorrow to go to Ireland. There, I'll move into my new home and start recruiting new students. My two best friends will join me the week afterwards, and we'll combine forces to make our school the best in the world.

So why do I feel like a part of me has died?

A part of me has.

The competitor.

Being a teacher is one of the most unselfish things I've ever done. Winning the Worlds, winning the All-Irelands, winning the North American Nationals, and winning the Great Britains- those were all about me, me, me.

It feels good to know that my life is no longer just about myself.

I'm leaving a lot behind now that I'm a teacher and moving to Ireland. But now I'm gaining more then I'm losing. I'll miss my teacher, classmates and cast-mates like anything, but I'll definitely go back to visit them. And I'll miss competing, but now I'll have the thrill of putting others on their first steps towards what I've achieved.

I have no regrets.

Love must never hold, never hold tight, but let go.